This is How I Feel

It's getting a bit self indulgent i know, but these are the consequences of being left alone with broadband at my Mum's house. I am looking after an ill brother and i am freaking bored to shit. i feel like a petrified oak. And since Dan insists on having some sort of 'life', i will have to put in the leg work on the jazz evening front. Prepare for a slow belly slide down the mud chute of my words into the fetid marsh self-pity. By tomorrow i will just be posting pictures of myself crying.

On a plus note (there is no such thing, only minuses) i have downloaded a fuck load of soul music. Brenda Holloway, Barbara & The Browns and Marlena Shaw are big on the iTunes at the moment. Soul, in particular Deep Soul, is really the perfect music for me, as it's the most whiny shit in the world. But transcendentally whiny, obviously. Irma Thomas, as I mentioned in my previous post, is currently my mouth piece. 'Yours Until Tomorrow', an incredible ballad from 1968, is unbelievable, I am sure her voice can literally melt wax and burn through microphones on this track. She genuinely sobs as she howls 'Let me be yours until tomorrow, just let me be yours until tomorrow, give me one night, one night of your life, baby, so i can go on'. I think she pierced the sun, and made me go 'owwww, poor me'.

But the ultimate comes with 'I Wish Someone Would Care', the national anthem of lonely blogging twats. The words say it all:

Sitting home alone
Thinking about my past
Wondering how i made it
And how long it's going to last
Sucess has come to lots of them
And failure's always there
Time, time waits for no one
And i wish, how i wish someone would care

Yeah

Some folks think you're happy
When you wear your smile
What about your tribulations
And all, all of your trials?
Smiles, smiles hide lots of things
The good, the bad, the hurt
All of this goes too
And i wish, i wish, how i wish someone would care

Wish someone would care
Don't you think someone should care?
Don't you think someone should care?
Sit down and think about yourself

boo hoo hoo